I just read an editorial by Mika Brzezinski, a former CBS anchor and now MSNBC anchor. Her editorial resonated with me because it was about her losing her job with CBS and how she chose to deal with the loss and her children. She tried to hide how hurt she was and tried to make it 'better' for her girls. Her girls were proud of where she was and so was she. Last summer I lost my job. We were very honest with Miles about the situation but told him it was going to be okay and it was going to be great because he and I were going to be able to spend great time together during the summer. I think he mourned the loss of my job far greater than I did actually. He loved where I worked and loved coming to see me there (same with Mika's daughter). Our children need honesty from us. I tried to do my job searching while he was at camp so that we could spend time togehter when he was home. Likewise with freelance work. I didn't want him to be hanging around watching tv or playing videogames while I was doing work at the dining room table. I thought that if I was given this so-called 'gift' of the summer with Miles then we would take advantage of this time together and go to the pool, play, whatever he wanted because it turned out that I ended with a new job starting in September right when school was starting.
Our children need to see how hurt we are when bad things happen to us. They need to see our struggles, successes, and failures so they can learn from us. How else are they going to learn how to cope when something like this hits them? I often like to say that I live in a world of delusion because it's a happier place, but honestly that doesn't teach Miles anything. He has to know what's out there and if I don't show him, who will?
No comments:
Post a Comment